It Takes Two to Test
by numbuh0051
Summary: Wheatley is now in charge of Aperture Science and believes he's a better A.I. then GlaDOS was. He might have a hard time convincing one of the cores of that, though...
1. The Boss

Wheatley really hadn't meant to do it. But he was really sick of being called a moron. And _she _had had the nerve to call him that yet again, even when he was an impressively huge and sophisticated robot and she was just a lowly bit of edible starch. But he hadn't meant to send the test subject into the underworld of Aperture Science as well.

"Well, they're probably not _dead_," Wheatley rationalized to himself "I mean she _has_ fallen from places that, well, normal humans would die from. She's probably just shaken up a bit. And she does deserve that. She was always a bit of a bossy-pants and she lied to me. Well, not lied, because that would require her to actually speak and she's too brain-damaged for that but she didn't tell me she was the one who _killed_ her. And I think that's lying by omission. She could've done an interpretive dance, at least."

Succeeding in (partially) placating himself, Wheatley looked around and realized that since the pair had been sentenced to a future of groping through the underbelly of the laboratory, he had absolutely no one to show off his mightiness to.

"Well, I'm the boss now," he said in satisfaction "And since I'm the boss, I have to tell everyone that Aperture…no…_Wheatley_ Laboratories is now being run by a _new,_ uh, boss."


	2. Kes

Sometimes it was nice to imagine that she was at the edge of the ocean, the waves washing over her feet, a sweet, cool breeze rippling through her hair. Then all of a sudden, she felt herself being picked up and spun around. She wasn't afraid of this, not in the least bit, for she knew this was her father and when she knew he wouldn't hurt her.

Until, _it _happened. Her father's face would start to contort and morph, his eyes growing red and sinking deep into his face, his mouth melting until the corners drooped into the edges of his jaw. She opened her mouth to scream as his powerful hands dug into her arms and he began screaming, an inhuman shriek…

_Scan Complete. No compromising corruption found. Please unplug yourself and continue with normal scheduled activities._

Kes's optic popped open and she groaned heavily. She wasn't really sure what to call these strange images that kept working their way into her every time she had a routine scan. She felt remembered everything there was to remember about her life before but she was pretty sure that this particularly memory had not happened. Except…whenever she did receive this visual, she had a heavy feeling of de je vu and nostalgia.

Well, there was really no use thinking about it right now, she thought as she complacently slid onto the management rail and glided off to her particular station. Of course, the route she took went by the old relaxation chambers and she felt a strong wave of regret and guilt at the sight of them. After they had gone offline, she had tried to free a good deal of them but it always ended with… Kes didn't want to think about it anymore and sped up to pass the chambers.

So doing, she ran right into a turret who was (oddly) situated on the route to her station. The turret's single red eye lit up.

"You are cordially invited into the boss's lair," were its only words before it dropped off the rail into the deep abyss below.

"'Cordially invited?'" Kes asked as she continued along the rail "'Boss's lair? The "queen" must have been more corrupted then she thought she was."

Despite the humor in the strange invitation, the core felt a slight uneasiness. Why was GlaDOS doing this? This was certainly not her MO, sending out invitations to random robots to visit her in her lair. Even more disconcerting was turret who had lived only to deliver the message then allowed itself to die. The little robotic mercenaries were supposed to be built for self-preservation, weren't they?

Kes didn't had a chance to ponder over this for, right after the turret's demise, a large tube came out of the wall and began to pull her in with its vacuuming power. The pressure ripped the core right off her management rail and down the endless, tunneling pipe which was connected to every part of Aperture.

This is definitely not GlaDOS.


	3. The Confrontation

The deep rumbling was now coming from every direction of his lair and seemed to grow louder by the minute. As he listened in satisfaction, Wheatley glanced around his lair to make sure that the other cores' would be in awe at what a magnificent leader they now had.

"Yes, the lasers are in place to etch my name, companion cubes available to toss around in the air, confetti on stand-by, and huge monitors everywhere. Yes, I think they'll be very impressed," he said, his optic glowing in pleasure.

In actuality, Wheatley was both nervous and excited about having a whole roomful of cores to show off to. _They_ wouldn't treat him like those other two had. If anything, they would be amazed at how great and powerful he was and for good reason, too. He was practically a _god_ now!

The new A.I. began to visualize hoards and hoards of other robots cheering for him adoringly as they gazed at him with absolute obedience. Yes, it would be great to be the god of this place. He would make it even better then _she_ could've even imagined.

At that moment, a core was spat out of one of the tubes hanging from his chamber wall and, within the minute, dozens of other little spheres were being shot out in every direction, rolling into every space on the floor until the entire place was crowded over with the robots. It was messy and very noisy, for it seemed that each sphere was carrying on a conversation that only included itself.

Wheatley made a sound like he was clearing his throat and said politely, "Excuse me, can I have your attention please?"

The incessant chattering, clanking and screeching continued.

Wheatley grumbled and spoke loudly, "Excuse me, could you all please be quiet?"

The volume of the room began to steadily increase.

"COULD YOU ALL SHUT UP!" he finally screamed in a deep voice that caused the room to shake.

The cores, most terribly frightened at the voice, immediately quieted down and swiveled themselves toward the source of it. Kes, who had been shot into the corner. took the opportunity to roll to her only friend, the logic core.

"What's going on?" she asked in a whisper.

The logic core turned to gaze at her a moment with her solemn deep blue optic and replied in her calm voice, "I believe the laboratory is now under new management."

Wheatley's voice rang over the scared robots, " Hello, everybody! Guess what? You are now under new management! That management is me!"

He twisted himself around impressively in his new body and set off lasers, monitors, and every other contraption he had put up to impress the cores.

Kes ignored him and said, "Why is he so familiar to me? I feel like I've seen or heard him before."

Logic core pointed out, "He is the intelligence dampering core that was placed on GlaDOS's chassis to interfere with her thought processes." She paused. "He was also in charge of the test subjects in stasis and, as I recall, used to follow and carry on conversations with you whenever you passed."

"That's why! But there's still something else. How did he get into her body in the first place?"

"I believe that is a question only he can answer. It seems that the other party involved is not available to satisfy your query."

Wheatley, meanwhile, was becoming annoyed that his tricks were doing nothing to sway the crowd in his favor. The cores still looked terrified.

"All right, listen," he said benevolently "I know this laboratory has seen many hard times in the past. But with me as your new leader, we'll go into a whole new area! An area with…with…no hard times! I promise you, I will be a better boss then _she_ could ever be! I'll get this lab into shape and into a new era! An era that will…"

"I can't listen to this anymore," Kes hissed vehemently.

"It would not be advisable to interrupt…" the logic core began, too late.

"Who put you in charge?" Kes demanded as she rolled herself closer to Wheatley.

"What?" Wheatley asked as his train of thought slowly drifted away "Who said that?"

"I did. Answer my question. _Who_ put you in charge?"

Wheatley swiveled his body around until he spotted a small core with a purple tinted optic that resembled a cat's pupil. He lowered himself until he was at eye level with her and puffed out his body arrogantly.

"Well, well, well, looks like we have a little would-be Holmes here. What's your designation?" he shouted mightily, hoping to make her cringe.

The core merely squinted her optic at him and replied, "Kes."

_Kes_. She passed by his station sometimes and Wheatley liked to follow her and share some funny story or experience he had. She was either friendly to him or distant, depending on how she felt but never made fun of him or called him a moron. Despite this, she had always confused him for she was a very peculiar core.

"Ahhhh, yes, Kes. I would've recognized your voice anywhere," Wheatley said "It's hard to hear you though."

A large claw came down from the ceiling, snatched her up and brought her right in front of him.

"How have you been doing, Love?" he purred.

Still getting over the shock of being grabbed, Kes snapped, "You haven't answered my question. WHO put you in charge?"

"A test subject. A tiny, little test subject. None of your concern."

"They're all dead."

"Not this one, not this one. Ol' Wheatley found her alive. Mute but alive and, uh, she stuck me in here. So there."

"Chell," Kes whispered.

"Uh, excuse me, what?"

"Where is she now?" she shouted.

"Well," Wheatley began nervously "Uh, she…sort of, might of fallen."

"Fallen down where?" the core demanded as thoughts of this stubborn test subject raced through her head.

"Uh, you see it was an accident but she was in an elevator and I…broke it."

Kes stared at him for a moment before hysterically crying out, "You killed her! You _murderer!_ How could you?"

"No, no, no!" Wheatley exclaimed "I didn't…I didn't _kill_ her! She was wearing those weird shoe things so, chances are, she's just flying down the pit and thinking to herself, 'Oh, well I'm falling now so I'm glad I wore my boots!'. And then, when she drops down, she'll be happy. Because she won't be dead! And she'll probably do a bit of a dance cause she's not dead! Too bad the potato wasn't wearing any boots."

"What potato?" Kes asked, relieved that Chell was alive.

"Never you mind," Wheatley responded in an authoritative manner "In case you haven't noticed, _I'm_ the one in charge here and _I _should be the one to ask the questions. You know, I never asked you what your purpose is. I mean we have logic core, adventure core, anger core but you, you don't seem to have one."

"You don't need to know what my purpose is," she replied coldly.

"Sorry, Darling, but, actually, I do."

With that, another claw came out of the wall, took off her back panel and began poking around in her mainframe.

"Get out of there!" Kes snapped as she felt her wires, circuits and various pieces of hardware being messed with.

Wheatley came over and peered into the core's backing.

"Hmmm, can't find what I'm looking for," he muttered "Well here's the motherboard. Now _that_ is a very nice bit of hardware in here. Let's see, if I just push past these wires I'll find…oh, that circuit board is absolutely tremendous. Now, for God's sake, where is it? Oh! Here it is!"

A few seconds later and Kes felt her panel being replaced.

"Well?" she growled bitterly.

"It seems," Wheatley paused. "You have no purpose. That's all right, Love. I can find something for you to do. You should feel fortunate that I'm in charge now. Oh, and, by the way, you have an extremely nice circuit board."

She was mortified. The idea of him searching through her mainframe and acting so calm as he commented about it made her embarrassed and furious.

In retaliation she snapped, "Do you honestly think you can run this place? You're not built for this and you don't know what you're doing!"

"Oh really! Wheatley roared "I don't know what I'm doing? If I didn't, could I do THIS?

He turned on all the lasers in the room and began to toss the companion cubes around them, creating a dizzying spectacle. The cores lying on the floor stared in amazement and fear.

"Impressed?" Wheatley asked smugly.

"About as much as I would be over a little boy playing with his father's gun," she sneered.

"Well, aren't you little Miss Sassy Pants," he grumbled "For your information, I can do things with this laboratory that no one would have ever thought of, no one would've ever _dreamed_ of. I can get this place back to what it used to be! Only better."

He leaned his optic close to her and added, "You might want to know that while I was poking around in your mainframe, I uploaded a few of your memories."

Kes had a vague notion that he was trying to whisper in her ear(if she had one).

"I noticed that you have a problem with one of them that just keeps springing up out of nowhere. I could delete that for you. It'll never give you any problems again," Wheatley murmured soothingly.

"I would rather be dropped in a bucket of acid then have you messing around in my innards again," she replied stonily.

Wheatley chuckled, "Well, I guess it was a bit uncomfortable for you, Love. But I had to find out what your purpose was if you had any. Which you don't. I still don't see why you have to be so stubborn about everything I'm saying. I'm a god now, _your_ god and you should be happy that I gave you that chance. Trust me, it would have been a very intimate favor."

Wheatley whispering these last few sentences right next to Kes's auditory circuits did nothing but cause her more uneasiness and she didn't respond.

After a few minutes, Wheatley finally sighed and said, "Why are you making this so hard for yourself? If you're going to be so stubborn then I think I have the perfect job for you. You're going to loveit. Just _love _it."


	4. The New Janitor

It had been a few hours since her confrontation with Wheatley and Kes was still stuck doing the assignment he had given her. Cleaning the entire facility from top to bottom. The logic core, perched nearby on a management rail, observed her with pity and pointed out comfortingly, "Perhaps this is one case in which silence would have been preferable to rebellion."

Kes gave her the dirtiest look she could.

"It would be sensible for him to punish you for only a week and then rotate your schedule to something that you would excel at." She paused. "But it seems that our new leader doesn't do things the sensible way."

"Oh, you think?" Kes asked sarcastically "Most of the cores are assigned to stroke his massive ego, the turrets are starting to look like mutants, and he sent the only person who ever gave him the time of day tumbling down a bottomless pit."

The logic core calmly replied, "Your anger and use of sarcasm is misused on me. It seems that it is meant to be solely directed at the core of which you speak of."

"Oh course I'm angry" the other core growled "The little jerk can't possibly run this place and if they're any test subjects who _are_ still alive, he'll finish GlaDOS's job and kill them off too!"

"I assure you that there is a very minimal chance that any test subjects could have survived after being in stasis for that long of a period of time and, even if they have, they would have been completely comatose without any hope of ever recovering without serious brain damage."

Kes stared at the logic core. Sometimes, it was truly frustrating having a companion who viewed everything in terms of pure logic. She wasn't very good at offering solace whenever something bad happened and only pointed out figures and predictions that only made the situation worse.

"Well, I'm not going to clean this up," Kes proclaimed "If our great leader wants the facility to be pristine, he can do it himself."

So saying, she used the extendable arm that had been attached to her earlier and began to repeatedly press a promising looking button. Sure enough, the room began to fill up with companion cubes, old turrets, and other pieces of refuse.

"This must be a decommissioned testing track," she said aloud as she finally looked around at her newly created mess.

Apparently, being decommissioned didn't mean that the test didn't work as a few of the cubes had been spread over the big red button and activated the door.

"You have been behaving uncharacteristically impulsive and I fear it may lead to an unfortunate outcome," the logic core stated.

"In certain situations, logic just doesn't work anymore," Kes replied as she eased herself out of the track and away from her janitorial duties.


	5. A Tete a Tete

"You are all doing it WRONG!" Wheatley hollered "What's bloody wrong with you?"

The targets of his merciless browbeating were a small group of turrets who were struggling with trying to use their lasers to etch a picture of him in the wall. Unfortunately, the robots were built for defense, not art and this rendered most of their drawings wildly amusing and inaccurate.

"Sorry," one answered in a pathetic voice.

"Sorry? Well, sorry isn't going fix all the walls you ruined! You're worthless! I mean, is it really that hard to draw? I'm not asking for much, not a mural or a collage. Just a simple drawing, that's it. But apparently you can't even do that!" he ranted.

A turret responded by spontaneously combusting and setting the others on fire in a chain reaction.

"Owowowowowowowow," they cried in unison as, one by one, they exploded.

Wheatley swiveled his body around in disgust. He was feeling very annoyed at all of his subjects. They were useless and couldn't do even the simplest assignments. Besides all this, he had a very uncomfortable feeling that just wouldn't go away and this only added to his irritation.

"They call _me_ a moron?" he grumbled "Now I'm going to have to clean them up _and_ do something about the bloody walls too. I give them a simple order and they can't even…oh, oooooooooooh."

Suddenly, he was seized with a very pleasurable sensation. It worked its way into his mainframe and spread into every one of his circuits. The other feeling that had made him irritable also seemed to disappear with the onslaught and he closed his optic in delight to enjoy feeling the wave of…whatever it was flow over him until it finally ceased.

"Ohhhh," he sighed "That…that was just…just absolutely tremendous. What…what _was_ that?"

Wheatley dizzily turned toward the monitors he had set up and began to search for the cause of the feeling.

"Turrets, no, they're really just standing there. A bunch of crap cores, no. They've been sitting there since she woke up. I would've noticed it. Wait…who messed that room up?"

Wheatley rewound the tape and intently watched as the little troublemaker he had punished earlier filled the entire room up with garbage and let it spill onto the testing button.

"That's what did it! Oh, God, I _need _to get more testing done. Everything else can wait. I absolutely _have_ to do this…"


	6. Testing for Two

There were many times when Kes wished she had listened to the logic core. This was definitely one of those times, she thought as she hung helplessly from a claw. A claw that was slowly escorting her to Wheatley's lair. Somehow she knew this had something to do with the mess she had spitefully made and was pretty sure he would be livid about it.

Still, she tried to look nonchalant as she entered his chamber. She would rather die then let him know just how scared she was. The claw stopped suddenly and let her swing in the air as Wheatley turned to look at her. She haughtily eyed him right back.

"Love," he began "you've been extremely naughty. I told you to clean up and you just made an even bigger mess."

"I guess I did."

"You're _really _lucky that the room fell apart anyway or I might've been very angry."

"Really?"

"Yes, really," he said as he began to circle her "I _am_ the boss after all. I can do anything I want."

"If you can do anything you want then why are you keeping me alive?" Kes scoffed.

"Well, while you were in there enjoying yourself…"

"I enjoyed myself a lot."

"It just so happened that the room you were in was a testing chamber."

"So?"

"When you were messing the place up, you pressed a button."

She could practically hear the smile in his voice.

"I pressed…a button," she replied uncertainly.

"Yes. And do you know what that button did?"

"If I told you I knew, I would spoil you telling me yourself."

Wheatley stopped circling for a moment and squinted his optic at her.

"There you go again. Being a little Miss Sassy Pants! You wouldn't been assigned to clean up if you had just shut up."

"Are you going to tell me what the button did or are you just going to keep harping?"

Wheatley growled and continued, "The button activated something in me."

"The on/off switch?"

"No," he said as he brought her close to his face, "When you pushed that button, ohhhh man alive! I got the most tremendous feeling. Oh, I can't tell you how great it was!"

He punctuated this with a soft moan.

"Spare me the details," Kes replied in disgust.

Wheatley turned around and added, "I absolutely _need_ that again. And you're going to be the one to help me."

"And how am I going to do that?" she retorted.

Wheatley moved himself right next to her and whispered, "You're going to test for me."


	7. A Confusing Sentiment

Kes was now furious beyond her mind. She was in a makeshift test chamber that her makeshift leader had created for her and was being chided to solve it.

"Come one, you can do this!" he exclaimed energetically "It's not that hard! Even for someone like you! Who has no arms! Just scoot over to that button over there and press it!"

"I refuse to be a slave to your pleasure," Kes responded harshly.

"Oh, come on. It's not like that at all, love. Think of it like a test. Which is what it is. And that makes it that much easier. So get on the button!"

The core responded by stubbornly rolling herself in the corner and rooting there. She gave the monitor Wheatley had set up a dirty look.

He sighed and said, "All right, you seriously need to stop being so difficult. You could have a great time solving this test but instead, you're sitting in the corner. Pouting. Like a child. A child core."

She didn't move.

Wheatley wanted to scream in frustration but instead, he began consulting a book that he had found in the facility.

"You know, Darling," he finally murmured in what he thought was a seductive tone "I think it would be _extremely _sexy if you rolled over to that button and pressed it. Yes, very attractive. And then maybe me and you can pitch some…what? I honestly do not understand that. It makes no sense. But really, I would love it if you rolled over and pushed that button. Really, really love it."

Wheatley heard a sound and turned to watch as Kes rolled toward the button.

"Oh! I talked you into it, didn't I? Well, that's great! Oh, here it comes, here it comes," he said as he closed his eye expectantly.

Nothing happened and after a full minute he finally opened his optic to see if anything had gone wrong.

"I made this so brilliantly. I don't understand why it would…"

Wheatley surmised the problem immediately. Kes had moved toward the button but instead of pushing it was now directly beside it with a satisfied gleam in her eye.

"Oh, oh, so now you're trying to be funny? Well, no one's laughing! Alright, you're going to be difficult. That's fine because two can play that game and I'm very good at it! GET ON THE BLOODY BUTTON! NOW!" he screamed.

Kes motioned her handlebar toward the large button questioningly.

"Yes, _that_ button," he groaned in exasperation.

In response, she rolled further away from it.

Wheatley roared and shouted, "GET BACK OVER THERE AND PRESS IT!"

She motioned as though she were thinking about it and began rolling in circles.

"WHAT? WHAT ARE YOU DOING? GET ON..GET ON THAT…" Wheatley stopped and collected himself before continuing calmly "You know what? I just realized I don't have to play your game because I'm the boss and the boss can bend the rules!"

With that, the whole room tipped sideways, sending Kes careening right into the button.

"Ohhhhh, yeeeeesss. That's it, oh, man alive. Oh, God, yeeeeees," he moaned "Great job. Oh yes, tremendous job. Ohhhh."

Kes felt a hot burst of anger and humiliation work its way under her hull as she listened to his sounds of pleasure.

Wheatley moaned again, clearly enjoying the feeling that testing gave him. After a while, he finally looked at Kes and said triumphantly, "See, Love? That wasn't so hard now was it? Oh and, by the way, _tremendous _job. Yes, you really did well."

He sighed in happiness as the last vestiges of pleasure left him and added, "Really, really well."

"I'm so flattered I could self-destruct on cue," Kes replied sardonically "Tell me, are we done? As amusing as this is, I don't think this has any bearing on the state of the laboratory."

"Oh, but, Love, this has a tremendous bearing on how _I_ feel," Wheatley pointed out "And that's very important because I _am_ the boss of the laboratory now. In other words, the better I'm feeling, the better this facility is going to be. And guess what? You're going to be the one responsible for it!"

He had said this last bit in excitement as if hoping that the sentiment would render her just as enthusiastic.

Kes just said in a voice that peculiarly sounded as though it were being forced through closed teeth, "What. Do. You. Mean?"

Wheatley happily answered, "What I mean is that you've got a new job now! Keeping me happy. By testing!"


	8. Enough is Enough

While it may have been a worthwhile assignment, Kes was doing very little to excel at it. Wheatley was becoming more and more irate as she did the exact same thing, chamber after chamber. First, she would plant herself as far away from the pleasure-inducing button as possible and then she would start to toy with him by acting as though she was going to obey him but at the last minute change course and go right back into the corner. He had tried to retaliate by shaking room up and treating her like an oversized labyrinth ball but she had simply used her handlebars to stop herself from rolling to the button.

All in all, it was taking an exceedingly extended period of time just to force her to produce that wonderful feeling and Wheatley was becoming furious. He had, after all, given her the best and most important assignment of all of them! It was completely in her power to give him that tremendous feeling and all she had to do was roll over to a little button and push it! He was practically giving her special treatment and she should be grateful, _especially_ after that little episode in which she questioned his authority in front of all the other robots.

But there was another reason the core was starting to irritate Wheatley. Even though she purposely went out of her way to disobey him, constantly gave him lip, and consistently showed him the contempt she had for him, he was starting to get the vague and uncomfortable notion that she was starting to cause a strange feeling deep in his hull that he just couldn't understand. He tried to tune it out by concentrating on how angry she was currently making him by becoming increasingly difficult but this had an adverse effect and made the feeling even stronger.

Of course, the thought had occurred to Wheatley that maybe she was starting to, in human terms, "captivate" him with her rebellious nature and difficult attitude but he quickly began to rationalize that she was merely an abnormal test subject and he had probably developed some sort of need to understand her.

In any case, while the two were on the fifth test, Wheatley found himself caught between irritation and the unnamed feeling he was experiencing.

"Love, to finish the test you need to get to the button!" he snapped "Not around the button, not across from the button but ON THE BUTTON! God, why are you doing this to me?"

Kes eyed him and rolled her optic.

"I mean it! I've given you the best job and never crushed you even when you deserved it! But, still, you're always disobeying me, always getting cheeky, always bloody irritating me! I could've just dumped you with the rest of the cores into crap jobs like testing the turrets or poking the dead humans to see if they were alive! I could've even thrown you into the container with all the defective cores but I didn't!"

She started to get a feeling of anxiety as she listened to him ramble on.

"But, no, I've always given you a chance, always gave you a job that was close to my lair, always let you get away with everything you did to try to sabotage me! Well, you know what?"

A claw was hoisted down and snatched Kes up roughly.

"Enough's enough."


	9. The Proposal

Kes was surprisingly calm as she was carried toward his chamber for the second time. She knew that he was probably going to kill her now but, oddly enough, she was perfectly complacent. She had taken her stand against him and, hopefully, the other cores would become emboldened enough to follow. Or, even better, maybe Chell would finally emerge from the pit she had fallen in and take him down. She was a very stubborn person, after all, and Kes had the feeling she wouldn't be too pleased that she had been thrown deep into the underworld of Aperture to begin with.

Everything will be fine, she thought as she was brought into his lair. I only hope the logic core will understand what happened to me. Kes mentally laughed. She'll probably assume that my "impulsive attitude" went beyond the bonds of logic and got me killed.

She sighed and turned to look at Wheatley once again. He was obviously furious as evidenced by the little red lights gleaming from the walls but there was something different about the way he looked. For some reason, mixed in with the anger was something like…desperation. Almost like he wanted something that was forbidden to him. For some reason, the anxiety that she had managed to push down was beginning to envelope her again.

"Well, we meet again, now don't we?" Wheatley said darkly.

"So we do…," Kes began

"Stop. Talking" Wheatley hissed. "I want you to just stop talking. Right. Now."

He began to circle her again and added in gentler tone, "All this time you've been talking. Well, I think it's my turn, don't you think, Love?"

Kes didn't reply.

"Oh, you're finally starting to listen to me!" he exclaimed happily "That's a change for the good!"

He made a sound like he was clearing his throat and started, "As you know, I am the core who is in charge of this entire facility now and I hold your entire world in my….er…handlebars. Every robot should obey me. But…you…you haven't really been doing that, now have you?"

No comment.

Wheatley stared at her for a moment before groaning, "Not you too! I told you to stop talking for a MOMENT not to turn into that silent test subject! For God's sake, why are you always so bloody difficult!"

In exasperation, he made the claw holding Kes swing closer to him and snapped, "WHY do you do this to me? Why?"

Seeing that he wasn't getting a response, he turned around to collect himself before continuing, "You are doing something very strange to me. And I don't like it. It's…it's extremely distracting and a little annoying! And, in case you haven't noticed, I am trying to run my facility and I can't do that when you distracting me!"

He swung back around to face her and shouted, "WHY IN BLOODY HECK ARE YOU SO FLIPPIN' DISTRACTING?"

Kes blew back by the force of his statement before resuming observing him with a measure of agitation that was steadily increasing.

"You're not going to answer that? Well then, I might as well tell you, I have found the perfect solution for this problem."

Kes ventured to ask, "And what is that solution?"

"Oh, you're talking again. Tremendous. The solution is…," he moved closed to her until there was barely a hair's breadth between them "You stay here. With me."

"What? I already live in Aperture…"

"Love, it's not _Aperture _Laboratories, anymore. When I became your leader I changed it to Wheatley Laboratories. I think it's clever. You know because I'm in charge now."

"Get to the point."

"Fine. What I mean is, you continue living in my facility but, instead of living wherever it was you were before, you live in my chamber with me."

Kes was too incredulous to speak.

"That way I won't be distracted anymore and you can help me with running everything! It's brilliant isn't?" Wheatley gushed "And, on top of all this, since you like humans so much, I'll let you supervise all chambers that use them!"

What on earth is he thinking? Kes thought, still too shocked to speak.

"There's plenty of room here and I'll even let you decorate!" Wheatley exclaimed, caught in the delusion that she was going to fully agree "I can build tests that you can finish for me and you can invite any friends you have over to see you!"

"Friends?"

"Yes, you do have friends, don't you? I'll give you books, little turrets to talk to, maybe even a human! If they're not dead, that is. I'll even grant you that little favor I told you about. You do know the one I'm talking about, right love?" he gave a sound that could only be described as a giggle "Yes, _that_ one. Of course, I'll have to poke around in you again but it's a pleasure for me! Yes, absolutely no problem whatsoever on my part. Listen, I'll give you anything you want, anything at all but…but I just need you to stay here with me. I need you here."

Kes was completely confused as she listened to his pleas for her to "stay" with him. Was he actually telling her he needed her here? Why? She glanced at him and noticed he was starting to look less like the "god" he had wanted to emulate and more like the little core who would constantly follow her around and try to carry on a conversation. The core who liked to be told that his stories were funny or his facts clever. The one who hated being made fun of, hated being called a "moron", and hated when he was put in charge of…

The humans. Chell was one of those humans and he had driven her down to the deepest depths of Aperture. She had listened to him, helped him, put him in charge but in the end he had betrayed her. Bumbling or not, he surely had known what he was doing when he had let her careen in that pit and no amount of books , friends, or erased memories was going to change that simple fact.

Kes began, "You brought me here so you could ask me to stay in your chamber even though the one person you should've asked you let die."

Wheatley bristled. "I didn't let her die, she was wearing the bloody boots!"

"But even if she wasn't, you wouldn't care," she retorted haughtily "All you cared about was getting your ego stroked! You didn't care about how many people you hurt to please yourself just as long as Wheatley was happy! You're the most selfish, insecure thing to ever graze this earth and you don't even know what you're doing! GlaDOS started by killing all the people in here and you're doing a fine job of finishing off her work!"

"SHUT UP!" Wheatley screamed, his body swaying erratically "SHUT UP! I HAVE ALL THE CONTROL HERE! I CAN KILL YOU RIGHT ON THE SPOT! I CAN CRUSH YOU, TOSS YOU INTO A BOTTOMLESS PIT! I CAN EVEN JUST RIP YOU APART AND THROW YOU INTO THE INCINERATOR!"

"Because I'm smaller then you," she countered "You're not a true leader, you're a coward! And let me tell you something, you can smash me, melt me down, burn me, or even shred me to pieces but it's going to take a lot more then that to give in to the demands of a immature, whiny BULLY!"

Wheatley was so enraged that he accidentally dropped her onto the cold hard floor. As she hit the bottom of his lair, Kes began to shake ever so slightly. Well, this is it, she thought. Now he's going to kill me and there's absolutely nothing I can do about it. She felt the claw seize her more violently then it had before, hoist her over to the depository marked "Incinerator" and drop her in.

"WELL, HOW ABOUT NOW, LOVE?" she heard him as she flew down the tunnel "NOW, AM I JUST A BULLY? IF YOU WERE SMART YOU WOULD BE SCARED RIGHT NOW!"

"No," she replied coldly "I'm not scared. It looks like you're just going to have to kill me."

"WHAT IS BLOODY WRONG WITH YOU? YOU'RE LITERALLY GOING TO YOUR DEATH! WHY AREN'T YOU AFRAID? I HADYOUR LIFE IN MY HANDS AND ALL YOU HAD TO DO WAS OBEY ME TO LIVE! BUT YOU DIDN'T, DID YOU? WHY NOT?"

"I'd rather have my integrity then my life," Kes forced out as your journey down the tunnel became rougher.

She could already see the blaze of the fire coming into her view. This is it, she thought as she tumbled out of the tunnel and into the scorching heat surrounding her. Suddenly, she felt herself being grabbed from behind and lifted away from the infernal below.

"What?" she said in confusion as she was pulled into a small opening near the top of the room. Her bewilderment only grew as she was sped into a hallway with many doors. As she was taken past them, she read the names that labeled them.

Cryogenics.

Cake Dispensary.

The Room Where All the Robots…

Oh, god.

It took her only a split second to realized that the arm had stopped right in front of that particular room. The door swung open and she was tossed inside to the earsplitting sound of high-pitched turret screams assaulting her from every angle.

"Oh, Logic Core, you could've never been more right," she groaned.

But at least you're not dead, a little voice in her mind countered.

"I'm starting to think death would've been preferable to _this,_" she said aloud as she prepared herself for an indefinite period of listening to the shrieks.


	10. Just Can't Get You Out of My Mind

Wheatley just couldn't bring himself to kill her. He had been completely put off by her statement and even more so by her intention to follow through on it but had rather hoped that fear of death would've overcome her defiance and led her to beg for his forgiveness. Naturally, she had refused and was nearly touching the flames when he snatched her up with his claw and threw her into the room where all the robots were supposed to scream at you. He would probably never have to hear her again.

Still, he couldn't stop himself from allowing his mind to drift in her direction until the drive to test became stronger. He needed to find new test subjects quickly. Getting an idea, he transported dozens of turrets and companion cubes to his lair and began to mercilessly take them apart and merge them together.

"Yeeeeees," he said to himself "These will be perfect for testing. Much better then that smart-mouth!"

Even as he told himself this, he couldn't help but get a vague feeling that even though the "itch" to test was massively strong and he was visualizing all the wonderful things he could change in the facility, thoughts and feelings of her were becoming pervasively intertwined within him.


End file.
